[Nill would be alarmed to hear all of those things - but right now, she's not paying attention. She's too busy trying to crush every shard of glass underfoot, every little bit that can reflect back at her, every screaming face that she can't help and couldn't help and would never be able to help.
There's another bit of glass still in the window frame that Nill raises her gun to without thinking about it, so desperate to make the images go away and the screaming in her head stop, but when she does this time she freezes. It's not Naruto or her senpai staring back at her this time - not the man who was on fire of the one full of bullet holes, or even the man with the wrench in his hand, who Nill was sure she had lived with, once upon a time.
This time the person staring back at her is Shika, and Nill feels instantly sick at the sight of him. His body is mangled and half robotic, completely different from the way he'd looked when he was alive, but Nill recognizes him instantly. How could she ever not recognize Shika? It's what he always looked like on the inside.
Her whole body is shaking now, and Nill lifts a hand to the side of her head, while she tries to steady the other hand. She tries desperately to pull the trigger, she tries everything in her power to will herself to do so, because this time she should be able to, she should be able to do this for him, to make the world stop hurting so much, but she can't. She tries and she tries and she can't, and in her frustration she ends up shooting at a puddle that's reflecting Yosuke back at her, even though her eyes never leave that large shard of glass. Nill can't shoot it, and she hates herself for it just as much as she did the last time.
Finally, Nill lifts her head - it's hard to say if she only just now heard him or not, because it's the first time she's reacted to what he said. She wheezes, inhaling a shuddering breath, and lets it out just as shakily.]
no subject
There's another bit of glass still in the window frame that Nill raises her gun to without thinking about it, so desperate to make the images go away and the screaming in her head stop, but when she does this time she freezes. It's not Naruto or her senpai staring back at her this time - not the man who was on fire of the one full of bullet holes, or even the man with the wrench in his hand, who Nill was sure she had lived with, once upon a time.
This time the person staring back at her is Shika, and Nill feels instantly sick at the sight of him. His body is mangled and half robotic, completely different from the way he'd looked when he was alive, but Nill recognizes him instantly. How could she ever not recognize Shika? It's what he always looked like on the inside.
Her whole body is shaking now, and Nill lifts a hand to the side of her head, while she tries to steady the other hand. She tries desperately to pull the trigger, she tries everything in her power to will herself to do so, because this time she should be able to, she should be able to do this for him, to make the world stop hurting so much, but she can't. She tries and she tries and she can't, and in her frustration she ends up shooting at a puddle that's reflecting Yosuke back at her, even though her eyes never leave that large shard of glass. Nill can't shoot it, and she hates herself for it just as much as she did the last time.
Finally, Nill lifts her head - it's hard to say if she only just now heard him or not, because it's the first time she's reacted to what he said. She wheezes, inhaling a shuddering breath, and lets it out just as shakily.]
Shi... Gilbert?