buy it use it break it fix it

[motioned]

Who: Fakir and Ahiru
When: Afternoon
Where: The kitchen of Phancyhive
Summary: Ahiru picks perhaps the worst day to introduce Fakir to modern technology.
Warnings: Angry toasters and action tags.

[She'd really been meaning to do this since he got here, but at first, things kept coming up - after that, it had honestly slipped her mind, with him holed up in his bedroom so often. So, this lesson had two purposes: to lure him out into the rest of the house, and to teach him how to use everything here.

As they enter the kitchen, she walks to the counter, gesturing towards the toaster.]

Okay, we're going to start with this!

Comments

[rewritter]

[ well here goes. he just side-eyes the toaster with an unsure look. what even... ]

And this is...?

[motioned]

It's a toaster! You put bread in and it comes out all warm and crunchy. I'll go get a loaf from the pantry.

[Rushing off temporarily!]

[rewritter]

[ it figures that it'd have something to do with bread. he watches her leave, then leans in a little closer to examine it while she's not around to look. ]

[motioned]

[That bread is hers and if you touch it you will be punished.

After a minute or so, she hurries back out of the pantry, pulling a piece of bread out of the open bag.]

Okay! So you just take a piece, and put it in one of the slots, and push the button down.

[She demonstrates, then leans against the counter to wait for the bread to toast.]

[rewritter]

[ I'm not doing anything suspicious!! ]

It's an oven, isn't it? There's no way it can be that small and still work. There isn't even a fire.

[motioned]

It does too work, I've done it a hundred times by now! It just takes a minute or two.

[rewritter]

Fine. I'll believe it when I see it.

[motioned]

[Come to think of it, it is taking a little bit longer than it should...]

Maybe I forgot to plug it in...

[rewritter]

Maybe you've broken it.

[ tempted to lean over and take a look... ]

[motioned]

I didn't break it, I didn't do anything other than what I normally do!

[Peeeeering over.]

It looks like it's plugged in, though... I wonder what the matter is.

[rewritter]

[ okay he can't help but be curious and do the same. ]

... Is it supposed to be smoking?

[motioned]

[A pause of surprise, before her expression shifts into one of panic.]

W-W-What? No! Q-Quick, turn it off, that could be really—

[She cuts off as the toaster starts to vibrate, looking at it in shock.]

It's never done that before!

[rewritter]

C... calm down! How do you turn off something like this...!

[ reaching over and trying to figure this stupid thing out!!... and then getting BURNT TOAST TO THE FACE OW WHAT. ]

[motioned]

Qua-?!

[Wow, that was close. She shoves one hand over her mouth, shocked. What was going on?]

T-That's never happened before!

[rewritter]

[ GRABBING THE TOAST AND THROWING IT TO THE GROUND o9" ]

Is that supposed to be a joke?

[motioned]

What? No, I swear, I've never - I've done this a hundred times! Are you okay? Did it hurt? It was probably really hot...

[rewritter]

It's just a piece of bread, idiot. But that thing just spat it out in my face!

[motioned]

Well, yeah, but it was a really warm piece of bread! And it doesn't - I mean, it's never done that before, I don't...

[rewritter]

So it just decided to start today? It's a machine!

[motioned]

I don't know! I mean, sometimes weird stuff happens around here, but not all the time! I can't think what else could be happening, though. Maybe we should unplug it.

[rewritter]

Weird stuff?! That's the best you can... let me do it, I'll take it down!

[ just like he did drosselmeyer's!! reaching for the cord... ]

[motioned]

No, don't!

[She grabs for his wrist, trying to stop him.]

It could be dangerous, grabbing the cord like that! It's electric.

[rewritter]

[ she pulls him away just as he gets sparked, so watch out for trace static! ]

Agh! W-what the hell?

[motioned]

[She jumps a little at the slight spark, but it's not too bad after the initial wince. She's more worried about him; gingerly, she turns his hand palm up so it's facing her.]

Are you alright? Did it hurt you?

[rewritter]

It's fine, I'm fine! More importantly--

[ S... STOP THAT, he will not be distracted. the toaster's still smoking, it better not blow up before he gets rid of it. ]